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The skeletons in my closet touch the flesh of my guilt.

I come undone as I yearn for forgiveness,
stealing glances at the purity of your soul.

My fantasy is a blessing in the moonlight,
a chalice of despair tipped to spill all needs.

My journey is perdition to reach the end of will.

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Daily Prompt: The Road Less Traveled

Pinpoint a moment in your past where you had to make a big decision. Write about that other alternate life that could have unfolded.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us OTHER.

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What if? Did I made the right decision? Maybe I should have turned right and not left? Did I choose the right path to follow?

Life is full of pauses and pondering questions like the ones above. Sadly we nearly never can really find out if the road we chose to travel was indeed the right one. Was this meant for us? What would await on the left?

In my opinion it is far worse to stand in the doorway and not make any decision. To stand in a point in between life changing events and not pick anything.

Free will, free choice – these are by far the greatest aspects of human nature.  I am glad that I can make a choice of life whichever I want. Later I have a right to regret my decisions and I can chose to change my life. Anyway I want it.

Daily Prompt: No Longer a Mere Mortal

You’ve imbibed a special potion that makes you immortal. Now that you’ve got forever, what changes will you make in your life? How will you live life differently, knowing you’ll always be around to be accountable for your actions?

Photographers, artists, poets: show us LONGEVITY.

Honestly it would have been awfully sad if I had to live forever. I believe, human lives are so meaningful and beautiful because we are given limited time on this Earth. We can do only so much but we strive for greatness, we reach the stars and chase our dreams knowing that there is a deadline to it.

One can live forever through various mediums: progeny, art, kindness…

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Daily Prompt: We Can Be Taught!

Tell us a moment or an incident that you treasure  – not necessarily because it brought you happiness, but because it taught you something about yourself.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us LEARNING.

–          You bitch, watch where you’re going. Stupid bitch.

Some time ago I heard those words hurled at me angrily after I accidentally bumped into a woman on the street. Now it may or may not be perfectly normal to you or at least nothing unusual in this age and day but to me it was an experience that shook me to the core.

You see no one has ever called me that name, no one has ever spoken so rudely to me before. In fact I only threw quick “I’m sorry” over my shoulder and quickened the pace to get away from the woman simply because I was afraid she’d go after me and hit me or something.

Two years ago I moved to the capital, three months ago I moved into the most notorious district of the city. I’m quite bothered if I have to get out at night and leave the comforts of my safe apartment. During the day, the place does not seem so foreboding and unsafe but when the darkness falls, well that’s entirely different story.

Least to say this accident taught me two things.

One, I have lived a privileged and sheltered life so far. I lived in a small town, in a moderately well off family, went to private school, graduated from traditional high school, finished prestigious university and then moved to a notorious city that never sleeps.

Two, people like me, who never experienced violence directed towards them are the most easily intimidated by even the slightest bit of it. Angry words from strangers, insults and manhandling are the factors that will petrify us. We cannot react with instinct, we will be just frightened into submission.

Life is not a movie where a weak woman suddenly retaliates and punches somebody in the face. Life is more prosaic and simple. Some behaviors can be taught but others will never come unless you are directly faced with violence, unless you learn how to react to it. And even then you can never be sure if your inner scared self will be up to the challenge.

A crash…

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Beginning:

The plate fell to the floor with a loud crash. Meredith looked numbly  at the white shells. The delicate blue embroidery was barely visible. The plate was a part of her wedding gift, a part of her former life. Now it was broken, just like her marriage. The pieces crumbled, unfit to be whole again. Who would have thought that such a magical story, something straight from a fairy tale, would end in such a disaster?

The divorce destroyed her. It was a painful and long ordeal.  Kevin and her have been married just for three short years when things started to go from bad to worse.  Two days shy of their wedding anniversary, when she was all chirpy and happy, her husband told her that he didn’t loved her. That he didn’t know if he ever did, that their marriage was a mistake and they would be better of apart. The news hit her like a ton of bricks. Till this day she remembers how her heart clenched, as if some invisible hand caught it in a steel grasp and didn’t want to let go.

Those days during the separation and finally the divorce, passed by in a haze of alcohol, sleeping pills and crowds of unknown faces. She threw herself into a binge of drinking and partying. Her friends were trying, in their own twisted way, to get her out of the pit hole she fell in. They were supporting her. However, the fact was that she didn’t want them to.

She didn’t want pity.

Meredith  wanted her husband back period. She wanted his love again. She wanted to know how can she turn back time, how to get back to this moment when they were so happy, when the world revolved around the two of them.

The time when she thought they could do anything, live any way they wanted. Just being together was enough. Just seeing his face, hearing him breath beside her feeling his touch, all of it was enough to get her through the day.

When did it all go to ruin? When? What went wrong?

And finally – could she have done something about it?

Ending:

Meredith looked at Jack’s sleeping face and smiled. The hair fell on his forehead and it took her every ounce of self-control not to reach out and brush it away. If she succumbed to the temptation he would surely wake up. She knew him well now, all his quirks and habits, and he knew her.

Who would have thought that she could be so happy, that she could thrive and love again? Less than a year ago she was in the deepest pitfall desperately clawing her way out. Less than a year ago she would give everything to have her old life back, now she couldn’t care less. Kevin and their marriage was a distant memory. Not entirely a bad one, but a one that taught her a valuable lesson. A lesson about her strengths and weaknesses. The divorce destroyed her but also set her free.

Now she was seeing bright future before her. She could see her life together with the men sleeping next to her, with Jack she could start anew. She could believe in that warm fuzzy feeling that spreads through your heart at the sight of a loved one.

Meredith took another second to look at her lover’s face and swiftly swung her legs to the floor. She quietly tiptoed to the kitchen.

She reached for two mugs in which they usually drank their morning coffee and stopped suddenly. The mug that she pushed far away into the deepest part of the drawer was smugly staring at her, challenging her. His mug, yellow with a slight chip.

Before she knew it she was turning the cup in her hands, weighing it, testing herself. She let the porcelain mug slip out of her hands and shatter with a loud noise.

When the world throws you a challenge and your life crashes into a million pieces, you can do two things. Sit down, give up and cry or pull yourself together and face the new reality.

Meredith looked at the yellow shells of a broken cup and smiled softly. Sometimes you just have to let one thing break so that you can discover something new. Something better. After all everything happens for a reason, and even though not always can you patch things up you can always start from the beginning.

Daily prompt from: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=640712155956109&set=a.599260846767907.1073741825.175634409130555&type=1&relevant_count=1.

Daily Prompt: Four Stars

Write a review of your life — or the life of someone close to you — as if it were a movie or a book.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us LIFE.

Life has different shapes, sizes, colors and smells. It can mean so much to one person and so little to the someone else. Life can be everything and nothing at the same time. It’s ambiguous, unclear and unpredictable. And yet we all strive to live good fulfilling life. Probably because we have only one.

Here are my examples of life:

Sometimes life is like walking hand in hand with either good or evil.

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Sometimes life is like a giant market bustling with voices, gestures and choices that can make or break you.

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Sometimes life is like a flower, first shyly budding from small seedling, then flourishing and thriving into something beautiful, worthy admiration.

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And this is my life. At least a part of it. Aside from writing I like to draw, sketch, paint, create. It makes me happy.

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Daily Prompt: Fight or Flight

When faced with confrontation, do you head for the hills or walk straight in? Was there ever a time you wished you’d had the opposite reaction?

First we need to establish the kind of confrontation we are talking about.

*If we talk about physical confrontation then I’m mostly inclined to retreat for safety seeing as I’m a girl of rather meager height and strength. Someone even described me as petite looking. I would have no chance in an open physical confrontation with a grown man or even another woman. Even writing this I see how powerless I am. It annoys me and makes me insecure.

That’s why I took up daily exercising and enrolled for a self-defense classes. Right now I would have to create a distraction and run away from my attacker but I hope that after the course I will grow some backbone and my confidence will be boosted. The fact that I will now how to hit and which spots to attack is only a plus. Sadly I know that in most cases, you cannot count for help, you need to be strong enough to defend yourself.

*If we talk about confrontation in a sense of some verbal conflict, then I most certainly would engage in a battle of wits and words. Of course not always the opponent is armed and sometimes such exchange is futile and resemblance talking to a wall. I usually tend to resolve the conflict peacefully but I can deliver quite mean and straight to the point comment.

I wish I had more backbone when I was still growing up and going to school. I became more confident during my years at the university. When I was young I used to take lots of verbal blows without retorting back. Nowadays I don’t take attitude from anyone. I know how to defend my views and reply even to the most vicious comments.

One of the perks of being capable with words is that one can use them as sharp swords that penetrate the armoire of ignorance worn by shallow people.

Daily Prompt: Say Your Name

Write about your first name: Are you named after someone or something? Are there any stories or associations attached to it? If you had the choice, would you rename yourself?

Photographers, show us  YOU.

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The picture is just a fragment of me, an important one but only one part out of many.

As for my name… My mother named me Marta because she liked the sound of it. There is no interesting story to it. I wasn’t named after anyone in my family. In fact I think I may be the first to carry that name.

After Wikipedia: Hebrew meaning: “the lady”. Roman meaning: dedicated to Mars. Also known to mean “Lady-Like” and “Strong” in Armenian.

My father of course had to throw his two cents in so he added another name and thus on all official papers my full name is Marta Margaret.

Do I want to change my name? Well, when I was young I thought that it would be cool to have some interesting name and not one that sounds so old and boring. However, with time I realized that my names is one of the gifts my mother gave me, and that she had the biggest right to name me. After all she gave birth to me and raised me with all her love. I am grateful to her, both for the name and for being the best parent a child could have.

A poem…

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Today’s exercise is the most daring and intricate out of all the “daily prompts” that I’ve written so far. For all it’s worth I cannot write a poem. No way, not a chance. I can interpret one but to write the stanzas…that is an entirely different and very challenging endeavor. Well let’s give it a go, shall we?

Inside there is a war going on,

the forces are battling and clashing,

the turmoil of thoughts chasing one another,

the ever chanching moods and atmosphere,

the bullet quick tears and rapid laughter,

the speedy nausea and quick paced joy.

All this mixed up in a bowl of life,

with a dash of atoms, pale skin and frail bones gave shape.

A thread that runs through the corridors of universe,

just trying to unravel the mysteries and gain the ultimate fulfillment.

Daily prompt from: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=616426651717993&set=a.599260846767907.1073741825.175634409130555&type=1&relevant_count=1.

Protagonist’s way of traveling…

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As we established earlier I will focus on the protagonist of my most current story. Her age, to be honest, is still a mystery to me. However, we can assume that she is in her late teens, somewhere around the high school age, graduation maybe…

Contrary to her peers she has no driving license and no interest in getting one. She is content with a bike, public communication and walking. In fact she likes riding local communication, because she can observe people. She deems them interesting and mysterious. Sometimes she sits in a bus and makes stories about the people she meets. She comes up with their names, professions, relationships, life stories. Life in general is fascinating for her. She thinks human life is most precious thing.

Daily prompt from: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=615620338465291&set=a.599260846767907.1073741825.175634409130555&type=1&relevant_count=1.