Being right on the verge of getting something generates a desire that has to be satisfied.
The author argues that “Men often admit, “You always want what you can’t have.””, and that is absolutely true. Never show him that he has you in his grip. Never show him that you are completely his. It all just makes him stop showering you with attention and lay back with his hands folded behind his head. He got you after all, hook, line and sinker.
Every so often remind him that you are and never will be his property. You may graciously allow him to bask in your presence and enjoy your company but you are your own woman.
The nice girl will doom herself from the beginning. She will answer his every call and cancel her personal plans and adjust her schedule only to meet the man.
Going out of your way to meet him is a big no no.
From time to time remind him who has to chase whom. When he tells you about his plans for you at the last minute, gently remind him that your time is precious and schedule tight. You will meet him when it’s most convenient for you. And he will get out of his way to make it happen.
When a woman doesn’t give in easily and doesn’t appear docile or submissive, it becomes more stimulating to obtain her.
Again we go back to the cycle the hunter and the hunted. Men love it, it’s like a primal tail that was left behind by the caveman.
The most thrilling chase is the one when the prey is ambitious, clever and tricky to catch. The more of a challenge you are to him, the more exciting it is for him to finally get you.
In every movie and romance, the mysterious woman gets all the interest. The woman clad in black velvets, with a blood red lipstick and a slim cigarette will get the man of the hour. Become that woman. Don’t let your docile side overcome the sexy one. Change into femme fatale and observe that thrill in his eyes.
However, you cannot seem too inapproachable or uninterested. Men like danger, as long as it does not harm them. They need that initial incentive, that spark in your eye, a little nod in his direction, a small gesture.
If the choice is between her dignity and having a relationship, the bitch will prioritize her dignity above all else.
Aretha sung R.E.S.P.E.C.T. not without a reason. If you want respect from your environment, from your man, you must respect yourself first. The good girl will fall head over heels for a guy and forget about her needs, her values and her respect.
The bitch will never do that. She has strong views and convictions and she won’t sell them cheap no matter how attractive the guy might be. Ultimately it is not worth it.
All those strong qualities attract men. They are not afraid of the bitch but they desire her, she seems to them a reliable, capable woman who is not afraid to stand her ground.
If you do not need a guy he starts needing you like air. If you don’t follow him blindly he turns into a believer and an acolyte ready for pilgrimage. If you don’t depend on him and treat him like a life rope he starts needing you like air.
Do the reverse, act like a doormat and he will stomp over you and leave you behind like a used up tissue.
The biggest variable between a bitch and a woman who is too nice is fear. The bitch shows that she’s not afraid to be without him.
With or without him… A song should have that title.
It is a fact that unfortunately most women are governed by an irrational fear of being left alone. By loneliness and prospect of no life after a relationship. They seems to think that without a man by their side they will be empty, half-good and hollow.
What an absurd view!
There is no such thing as a two halves stuck together by glue. There are various people that wander around the paths of life and have chance encounters. Some will fit together like gloves, some need more friction to get it going and some just won’t fit no matter what. We are searching sometimes our whole lives. We certainly can’t settle for the next best thing when there is so much territory to explore. There are billions of people on the world. Do you really think that this one person is assigned to you for life?
Never be afraid to step out of your comfort zone and taste freedom, taste life without him. It is necessary not only for the health of your relationship but mostly for your mental health.
Your strength will come from this knowledge: there is life without him and it will be a damn good life – single or not.
Act like a prize and you’ll turn him into a believer.
Of course you can never, never, absolutely never (yes repeat it as many times as necessary) put yourself down and undersell your qualities. Yes, you are that awesome, yes you are that beautiful,, yes you are that smart and yes he is incredibly lucky to have met you. Period. Really don’t add any afterthoughts. In fact don’t think and just lean back and enjoy the look of utter admiration on his face.
Man becomes elevated by the woman.
Another issue the doormat has and the dreamgirl aka the bitch doesn’t is the need to compare herself with other woman. Girl, understand one thing, you are exceptional and one of a kind. No need for comparisons. We look as good as we feel deep inside our hearts and minds.
A plus is that the man you are with will appreciate your confidence and the fact that you know your worth. It’s as simple as that.
It is your attitude about yourself that a man will adopt.
The way you perceive yourself is the way your surroundings sees you. In other words don’t put yourself down or point out flaws and shortcomings. If you don’t notice it, nobody around you does.
It is a truth generally known that men are not the most perceptive species on Earth. Therefore do not make it easier for them to notice tiny, irrelevant details about yourself. Think of the first date and the courting period like an extended job interview. You can make good impression only once. You want to ‘sell’ yourself in the best way possible for the best price possible.
And no, the price is not negotiable, you take what you get and the man has to thank gods that a beautiful and perfect creature like yourself is interested in him and allows him to bask in her fabulous company.
Wouldn’t you agree Dear Ladies?
If you start out dependent, it turns him off. But if it is something he can’t have, it becomes more of a challenge for him to get it.
Honestly this must be one of the most basic and thoroughly valid principles in the book. It cannot be emphasized enough how important it is to make a man fight for your attention and perceive you as the most intricate game challenge.
Man usually want the most what they can’t have. It is as simple and as complicated as that.
Most men will never notice your flaw or shortcomings until you point them out yourself. So why would you want to do it? You may think your nose is big and does not fit your face but he will never see it the way you do. For him it’s either just a nose or an adorable part of your physique.
You may falsely assume that being too bold and beautiful, self assured and generally confident is unwomanly and brass. Don’t worry, humility is not a serious flaw of character and can be easily cured as the author says. She points out that nothing is gained by being too humble or putting yourself down.
Golden rule: know your worth and stick to it, never let anyone talk you out of your convictions.
Sometimes a man deliberately won’t call, just to see how you’ll respond.
Sneaky but viable.
I agree with the author that it is ‘human nature for a man to test the waters to see how much
he can get away with’.
Man are often like children. Remember when you were a child and you tested the limits of your parents nerves, patience and love for you, when you screamed, run away or did contrary to what you have been told? Sometimes for fun, sometimes in spite but always to test the thin boundary and your powers.
The same goes with men trying to test the waters with women. They want to know immediately how low you are willing to bend and how far are you willing to go to satisfy his needs.
Be a challenge and don’t reveal all your cards at once. Keep him guessing and interested.
And of course pay him back double…Take your sweet time returning his calls or messages. In no time he will come to you scared that his ‘testing phase’ went too far and long.
And then the ball is in your court. Or both balls actually…
A woman is perceived as offering a mental challenge to the degree that a man doesn’t feel he has a 100 percent hold on her.
To some point, a woman has to appear like a mysterious challenge. Previously we talked about the hunter and his prey. Here the hunt is taking place on mental ground. Of course we don’t want to intimidate the hunter with our multiple degrees in rocket science and quantum physics. We just want him to appreciate what he got and praise the gods for sending him a brilliant, beautiful and exceptional girl.
To sum up, we want him to think he hit the jackpot.
The bitch will never agree to bend to his rules or habits. She will have her own views and interests. If he wants to watch straight 12 hours of football, good for him. She will not participate in this, as she has more interesting things to do. Contrary the sweet, good girl aka doormat. She will be seated calmly and patiently, bored out of her mind but too afraid to speak up. She makes the mistake of thinking that if she disagrees with him, he will stop liking her. Maybe even consider her as rebellious and too difficult to bother.
Giving a man 100% hold on you is a big no no.
If you are up to it I propose a little test. In the book, the author suggest that when it comes to feeding the man, the bitch will serve him a three course meal that starts with a scrumptious dish called Le Popcorn and finishes with Coca Cola.
Now, what I suggest is to maintain from the beginning that you simply cannot cook and don’t feel comfortable in the kitchen cooking anything else than water and of course microwave Le Popcorn.
Trust me, the answer he gives you after you casually let it slip that you don’t cook, can tell you more about him and how he perceives your relationship than any seemingly spontaneous bouquet of flowers.
And for those that replied ‘Then we will eat out’, there is a prize comparable to golden grail. A surprise dinner by the bitch. But only if and when he deserves it.
The women who have the men climbing the walls for them aren’t always exceptional.
Often, they are the ones who don’t appear to care that much.
Simply put giving away too much or investing too quickly and too abundantly is the worst possible scenario for a woman who is trying to appear interesting. Becoming available and open to his every beck and call is a big no-no. A woman needs to be independant and show her strength in the beginning rather than her willingness to bend backwards for the guy.
Of course there are two schools.
We have strong women and sweet girls. Both types want the same but achieve it with different means.
Strong woman will quickly mark her territory and expertise. She will come off as smart, savvy and successful. She won’t hang on him or let him decide and pay for everything. She will insist on splitting the bill and negotiating the place and time. Even though she can, she will refuse to cook for him. She will meet him only when it is convenient to her. Gradually she will reveal also the softer side, will be willing to flex her schedule for him and maybe even cook for him. However, all that will become possible only when he appreciates her and is hooked and ready to start some more meaningful relationship.
The sweet girl on the other hand will either play the part or truly act it. She is either a cunning fox or a doormat ready for the masters feet.
She will appear rather silly and simple minded. She will require guidance, care and attention. Also don’t expect her to think of anything other than how to please the master. She will be more than willing to cater to his needs and serve him a full four course meal the first time he visits her home. Her timetable is as flexible as the chewing gum and can be stretched and torn in order to suit his needs.
Now the cunning sweet girl, will only act the part. She will appear all of the above but truthfully she will have a plan ready. All her seemingly wrong actions ultimately will have a good explanation and fabulous result.
Which type are you Dear Reader?